The best way to live in the second half of 2020: it's expensive to love yourself for the rest of your life.
Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
01
living in the eyes of others, too tired
Yi Shu said in "Beautiful New World":
the heroine of the Japanese TV series "the New Life of Yoshima" plays the role of living for others all day long.
in her workplace life, in order to cater to the preferences of others, she became a "dedicated outsourced worker" for her colleagues. She accepted all the chores from her colleagues in exchange for a good evaluation of herself by her colleagues.
when chatting, I pretend to understand and go along with my colleagues in order to integrate into them and gain the approval of my colleagues.
obviously I brought a bento, but because I couldn't refuse, I pretended that I didn't bring a bento and went to eat with my colleagues.
facing her boyfriend, she changes ways to please her boyfriend every day. Her boyfriend likes straight hair, so she gets up early every morning to straighten her natural curls.
her boyfriend has special hobbies, and without exception, she all tries her best to satisfy him.
but Oshima's efforts to do this did not get good comments from others, but instead, it was the mockery of colleagues behind their own back, boyfriend's complaints and betrayal.
there is a saying:
if you live in the eyes of others all day long, you must have wronged yourself and will not get a positive response.
and living yourself bravely is the best answer to yourself.
unlike the heroine, the green mother-in-law in the play is a person who lives for herself, doesn't care what others think of her, and lives happily and freely every day.
rather than please others, it is better to live a full life.
after breaking up with her boyfriend, Xiao decided to change her past character and not walk alone in the eyes of others. Instead, she regained her self-esteem, became confident and calm, and lived like herself.
it has been calculated that life has 36500 days and 876000 hours on the basis of 100 years old.
time is limited, life is endless.
in this limited time, why should we live in the evaluation of others and make ourselves physically and mentally exhausted?
in this life, if you can't be kind to yourself, you won't be able to live a happy life no matter how much you please and flatter others.
Don't be desperate to accommodate others. You must first know how to love yourself before you can win the respect of others and treat each other squarely.
the best way to live is to give up useless socializing, cut off the people who make your heart tired, and make yourself happy.
02
the best state of life is to please yourself
Nina Laris Haider wrote in his book Love yourself:
make yourself feel better and be able to live the way you want to be.
there is a literati who loves writing and has written a lot of works, but he is not well-known even if he is not recognized by the public. For this reason, he felt very distressed.
so he poured out his gloomy troubles to a Zen master about why his works could not be appreciated by others.
the Zen master pointed to a plant of nocturnal incense outside the window and said, "do you know why nocturnal incense blossoms only at night?"
the scholar was puzzled and shook his head.
the Zen master smiled and said, "it blossoms at night, but no one notices it. It blossoms just to please itself."
when the Zen master saw that he was puzzled, he continued: "if you are open during the day, it is all to attract attention and be appreciated by others." And night incense, in the case of no one to appreciate, still open themselves, fragrance themselves, it is only to make themselves happy. "
the literati smiled and said, "I see." A person is not to live for others, but to live for himself and to be a meaningful person. "
the Zen master looked at the literati and continued: "only by pleasing yourself can one not give up himself; only by pleasing himself can one influence others."
you know, we don't exist for others in this world.
the true meaning of life is to be able to live your own color in your limited life in your own way.
people who can please themselves are not selfish or regardless of the feelings of others, but because they know how to live the life they want in their own way and make themselves happy and happy, so as not to waste their lives.
Life is made up of all kinds of joys and sorrows, embrace them heartily in the face of joy, and deal with them calmly in the face of sorrow and anger.
in this world, no one can influence you. You are the only one who can influence your mentality.
Zhang Defen said:
please yourself and make your life better. At the same time, you can also infect the people around you and add a pleasant atmosphere to their lives.
in the final analysis, it is most important for a person to know how to please himself.
03
there is more than one way to open life
there are countless ways to open life, and the best way to open it is to live your life the way you like.
some people are busy for others all day long, but forget the scenery around them; some people bow their heads in the face of suffering and become depressed all day long; some people can't control their own state of mind and complain all the time.
in the end, the best way to treat yourself is to keep yourself comfortable.
Don't always forget the love of life, the pursuit of your ideals, and the ability to please yourself because of the external pressure and the trivia of life.
Don't worry about the mountains and rivers in other people's mouths, the stars in your eyes are brighter than any other stars, because they will always belong to you.
A student askedChen Guo, a female professor at Fudan, has a question: "you say, which is important, whether others like you or you like you?"
Chen Guo replied, "all are very important."
then, think about it and say, "but when you can't do both, it's more important that you like yourself."
whether life is long or short, we should not waste our time trying to gain the approval of others. We should enrich ourselves, love ourselves, and make ourselves more beautiful and sunny.
Life belongs to you, not for others. Other people's comments can only be side suggestions, but it is you who really determine your way of life.
Cai Kangyong said:
in the final analysis, only you can have the whole world.
try to be a person who is liked, praised and loved by yourself, not just to please others.
in this life, most people have experienced many different living conditions, and to please themselves is the best living condition.
to please yourself, obey your heart, live according to your wishes, don't get entangled with trifles, face gains and losses calmly, don't stick to the past, and don't be afraid of the unknown future.
only by pleasing and caring about yourself can you live a happy life.
04
there is a saying: "he who pleases others is king."
for the rest of my life, love yourself a little more, keep the best things for yourself, and let yourself have no regrets every day.
May the rest of your life be blessed by the years and live up to this trip.
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