The best state of mind: always think about your own mistakes and not blame others

01

when something happens, reflect on yourself more and blame others less

the most taboo thing about getting along with others is to treat others with a critical heart, but not to find a reason from yourself.

before, I saw such a fable.

A fox slipped accidentally when it was climbing over the fence.

when he was about to fall from the sky, he grabbed a nearby rose and saved his life.

however, although he did not fall, his foot was stabbed by a rose and lost a lot of blood.

looking at his limping leg, the fox was very angry and reprimanded, "Why are you like this? I ask you for help. If you don't help me, how can you hurt me instead?"

after hearing this, Rose smiled and said, "Fox, where is it my fault?" I have my own thorns, and I stabbed you because you were not careful.

when you read this, you can't help laughing at the fox.

but in daily life, don't we do the same stupid thing-when we have conflicts with others, the first reaction is not to reflect on ourselves or meditate on our own life, but to cover up, escape, and evade.

do not realize that this can only make things worse.

for example, when husband and wife quarrel, neither of them will let the other. Even knowing that both sides are wrong, they will unconsciously utter evil words out of self-protection.

when your boss points out your mistakes at work, someone can easily find many excuses for yourself, such as "colleagues don't cooperate", "I'm unlucky, I'm stuck in traffic" and so on.

in fact, whether it's work or life, don't complain when you encounter problems.

find the reason for everything from yourself, more heart to heart, less perfunctory responsibility, so that you can iron out the wrinkles in your life and make your life hot.

you know that being picky towards others is hateful to everyone; doing things with a friendly heart is lovely.

02

know how to examine yourself in order to meet a better self

what is the most difficult thing in a person's life?

it is the most difficult to know yourself.

just like our eyes can see in all directions, but can't see our own eyelashes.

and introspection is like "looking in the mirror". It allows us to see our shortcomings clearly and correct them accurately, thus getting better and better.

the legendary Steve Jobs is a man of great introspection.

he has a well-known habit of asking himself a question every morning-"if today is the end, will I do what I plan to do today?"

if the answer is "no" for several days in a row, he will immediately change and never waste every day.

but when he was young, he also suffered many setbacks.

at that time, he was eccentric, bossy and conceited, and he was very unpopular in the company.

not only did the partners quarrel with him and left one after another, even the employees of the company avoided meeting him.

many people dare not even take an elevator with him.

coupled with being overconfident in your own technical judgment, you have made a lot of wrong decisions.

in the end, because of his uncooperative personality and headstrong attitude, he was unanimously "expelled" from the Apple company he founded in a board vote.

but he did not sink because of this. After this crisis, he began to look at himself and look for the reason.

as he said later in his speech at Stanford University, "things are inadequate and wisdom is unknown, and I always use this to reflect on myself."

it is precisely because of introspection that more than a decade later, he returned to Apple with a more mature posture, saved the company from crisis, and created one amazing miracle after another.

introspection allowed him to turn his current predicament into the course of Phoenix Nirvana.

people will encounter all kinds of failures and tribulations in their lives, some will complain and some will reprimand loudly, but have you ever thought that the problem may lie with ourselves?

so, find the reason for everything from yourself, reflect on yourself, and meditate on your past.

if it's your problem, face it and turn it into an advantage little by little; if it's not your problem, take it as a warning and encourage yourself.

I believe that only through daily self-examination and continuous growth can we meet a better self.

03

the more excellent people are, the more they know how to introspect

Mencius has a saying: if you can't do it, you can't do it.

means that when you encounter a failure and have a conflict with others, don't always think that it is other people's fault or environmental problems, but know how to find the reasons from yourself.

in fact, you should not only reflect on yourself in adversity, but also in your daily life.

introspection is the only way to self-improvement.

only when a person knows how to reflect on himself and reflect on himself can he control his own mind and destiny.

Tao Xingzhi, a well-known educator, listed "four questions a day" to check his daily life:

"have you made any progress in your health?"

"have you improved your knowledge?"

"have you made any progress in your work?"

"have you improved your morality?"

and American writer Franklin is also very good at finding problems from himself.

when he was young, he found 13 serious shortcomings, such as wasting time, getting used to arguing with others, and worrying about trifles.

if you don't correct it in time, your life will not change.

in order to correct these deficiencies, he specially customized a moral Day for himself.Write down 13 qualities that need to be improved in a book, compile a pamphlet, and then reflect on your words and deeds in front of the pamphlet every night and write it down.

in fact, these people who are praised by everyone are not infallible, but know how to reflect and correct themselves all the time.

if you often think about your own mistakes, you can avoid tumbling and detours.

people who do not reflect on themselves will find a lot of excuses for themselves, and then continue to sink in the status quo, for a long time, do not even know the reasons for failure.

if you ask, don't they expect a different life?

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of course not.

but without introspection, it is difficult to understand, and it is difficult to change without self-reflection, so we can only turn around in the strange circle of failure.

there is a long way to go in life, which is bound to be rough and tortuous.