The best age for a girl to develop her character. Parents must not ignore these things.
Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
in people's consciousness, it is generally believed that girls are more vulnerable, more worried and more likely to get hurt.
in fact, in the process of girls' growth, there are the following five stages, parents understand earlier, children have more self-confidence.
01
stage 1: sense of security
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1-2 years old: whether I am safe or loved.
babies are born defenseless, and they instinctively judge whether they are adequately cared for by the reactions of those around them.
only when her needs are answered will she think she is safe and loved.
this belief will take root in her heart and stay with her for the rest of her life.
suggestion:
1. Daughters need a mother, calm, gentle, continuous appeasement
the key period of interpersonal communication is when the baby is 6-12 months old, at this stage, they will not appease themselves, so they are easy to get upset and cry.
mothers need to help them calm down, pick them up, comfort her, help her relax, and then she will know how to comfort herself.
so, something like "what's up, baby?" It can't be too much to say that Mom is here and Mom loves you.
2. Daughters need fathers, happy and presumptuous play and companionship
Studies have shown that children who grow up with dads are much more resilient to stress than those who only play mild games.
it is very important to play with children. Play can stimulate the potential of their brains, people who love to play are good at innovation, and children who grow up in a happy state are not flinching, dull and energetic.
at this stage, don't easily hand over your children to strangers-especially various early education programs.
02
Phase 2: explore
2-5 years old: is the world a fun and interesting place?
at this stage, girls begin to become interested in the world around them, gain self-confidence, develop creativity, and become smart.
and it's all based on sense of security, which she set up in the first stage.
if the adults around her always maintain a close relationship with her and take care of her, then she can relax, explore the world, and gradually develop her artistic and athletic ability.
suggestion:
1. Talk more about "boys" with girls
for boys, parents may add more concepts such as numbers and space in their conversations, while for girls, they put more emphasis on feeling and beauty, that is to say, we unwittingly begin to instill rational feelings in boys and emotional experience in girls.
in fact, we can talk more about numbers and building blocks with our daughters, which is of great benefit to the development of their digital space ability.
2. Using the simplest things to replace trendy and expensive toys
doesn't mean buying children the latest toys. Those things don't help your daughter develop her hands-on and exploration skills.
on the contrary, prepare a few toys for your daughter, put them in an easy-to-get box, and often change them-- some waste paper, colored crayons, crayons, pigments, greeting cards, stickers, etc., are a very creative toy library to develop their hands-on skills.
3. Nature is the best enlightening teacher
of course, contact with nature is the most important.
Electronic products are far less important than three-dimensional nature. Learning piano and other learning activities will damage girls' intelligence if they start too early.
Children need their own time, daydreaming and space to do nothing so that their imagination can develop.
so turn off the TV so that children can think and talk to themselves.
4. Don't let beauty become an encumbrance to play
during this period, girls will begin to love beauty, but most mothers make girls look too beautiful, and all kinds of beautiful wrinkled skirts, headgear and shoes will only bind the hands and feet of the child's exploration. on the contrary, those convenient and sturdy clothes allow her to play with water, mud and paint unscrupulously.
second, don't buy your daughter toys with special emphasis on appearance and dress. Girls will also like rockets, castles, trucks and farms. Don't be limited by rules and regulations. Jump out of the preset so-called "what girls should do."
03
stage 3: socialize with people
5-10 years old: can I get along well with others?
it may not be easy for children at this stage to get along with other children or adults, but it can also be fun.
she will learn from her parents and then from others that she is not the center of the universe and that other people have their own feelings and thoughts.
throughout primary school, she will gradually learn how to value herself as well as value and respect others.
similarly, all this is based on early experience, and if she gets kindness, she will become a kind person.
if her emotions are answered, she will become a compassionate person.
suggestion:
1. Respond in time to his daughter's confusion on the social road
A boy of the same age gets into a fight with a friend and may be together again an hour later.
but it is not so easy for a girl to come out after having trouble with her friends. She needs parents to care for her and comfort her.
parents are her social leaders, but in most cases they can help her analyze and give advice without intervention.
2. Cultivate a hobby and make more friends of different types and ages
Friends of different ages can also bring all kinds of benefits to daughters. Older men who are funny and intelligent are strong in heart and do well.Women who don't stick to one thing, friends from the suburbs or other schools.
such people are like a mirror that allows girls to see themselves differently.
04
stage 4: know your heart
10-14 years old: whether you can find your hidden self and know what true happiness is.
Girls in junior high school are very adult-like, sensitive and mature, but please note that girls at this stage need more attention and companionship, need more teaching, more explanations, more questions, and participate in more meaningful activities.
instead of pushing her out and letting her grow up alone, she is under all kinds of pressure.
suggestion:
1. Help the daughter discover the truest self in her soul
the girl begins to have a strong sense of self and wants to be an individual of her own.
during this period, she needs someone to help her figure out what she agrees with and supports, what she cares about most, and what her interests and passions are.
2. Find a role model for an older woman for her daughter
let her know how to be a strong and meaningful woman, such as a teacher, a coach of some of her favorite projects, her aunts and aunts can serve as role models for her children.
they should be warm, calm and insipid, and appreciate and support your daughter.
3. Strengthen his daughter's three flames
Peter Benson, America's top expert on puberty, believes that all teenagers have some kind of fire, which he divides into three categories: talent, character, or undertaking a task.
the task of parents is to discover and strengthen the flames of their children, which can make them happier, more confident and healthier at school.
05
stage 5: stepping into the adult world
14-18 years old: can I be responsible for myself?
my daughter will reach adulthood at the age of 18, and preparations will begin at the age of 14 to take this big step. At this stage, we should not take it lightly.
the control center of the daughter's prefrontal cortex is not "finished" yet. when she is stressed and nervous, the "amygdala" of the brain, the center of impulse and emotional response, will immediately control her, when they need their parents.
suggestion:
1. It may be a bit old-fashioned and unpopular to set some moderate rules for your daughter
that she must be at home at what time in the evening, forbid drinking, and know where she is and who she is with. But this is exactly what responsible parents should do.
2. Remind your daughter not to be bound by popular aesthetics
Mom should be a healthy role model, don't pay too much attention to weight, don't talk about dieting, don't think about losing weight.
Don't divide food into "good food and junk food", but "daily food and occasional food", and don't feel guilty about eating those high-calorie foods.
once your daughter pays too much attention to her weight, her mood changes greatly, and it seems very picky and painful to eat, then you should be on guard against eating disorders. Early intervention is very critical, and you must choose a professional therapist.
3. Let her daughter learn to stand on her own feet and be responsible for herself
14-year-old Marilla crossed the road with her classmates one day after school and was badly hit by a big truck. After she recovered, she suffered from severe traumatic stress disorder and was very afraid of being near the road and the car.
the psychiatrist asked Marella who was responsible for the accident. Marella thought it was of course the driver who ran the red light.
the psychiatrist asked if you had observed the passing cars, which awakened Marilla, who realized that she trusted the sidewalk and traffic lights so much that she didn't observe her surroundings.
gradually, Marilla was no longer afraid of roads and cars, and she completely recovered.
this story is called "growing up". It tells girls that they should be responsible for themselves, stay awake and alert, which can protect themselves.
whether it is a boy or a girl, the most important thing is to train children to have strategic thinking from an early age, to face one thing, not only to focus on the present, but to plan for the future.