Practice emotion (this article is priceless)

there is such a story in the Historical Records of the Chu Family.

one day, a woman from the State of Chu and a woman from the State of Wu competed for mulberry leaves. When the girl of Chu lost, she was so angry that she went home to her father and asked him to vent her anger.

when the father of Chu saw this, he called his relatives and went to Wu Nu's family for an explanation.

after the two families met, they got into a big fight and accidentally got killed.

when the officials of the border cities of the two countries heard that the people of their own countries had died, they attacked each other angrily, and finally the State of Chu destroyed the border towns of Wu.

when King Wu heard this, he sent tens of thousands of troops to fight against the State of Chu.

when the originally friendly neighboring countries fought hand-to-hand, who remembers that the origin of the initial contradiction was just one or two mulberry leaves?

in fact, we often repeat similar stories in our lives.

most of the time, because you can't control your emotions, a little thing is magnified infinitely, and finally disturbs your own life and that of others.

writer Dickens once said: "A sound emotional state of mind is more powerful than a hundred kinds of wisdom."

the highest wisdom of a person is to know how to practice his emotions.

01

most of the hardships in life are emotional poison

in the 2006 World Cup final, legendary star Zinedine Zidane led the French team against Italy.

as a 34-year-old veteran, it was Zinedine Zidane's last hit at the World Cup, so he worked very hard and scored the Italian goal shortly after the opening.

with his excellent performance, the French team firmly took the initiative throughout the game.

with 10 minutes left in the game, Italy's defense was on the verge of collapse.

at this time, Materazzi of the Italian team deliberately said a few insulting words to Zidane during a struggle.

Zidane couldn't stand it and slammed into Materazzi's chest.

Materazzi fell to the ground and rolled left and right, his expression was very painful.

seeing this, the referee did not hesitate to show a red card to Zidane and send him off.

the French team, which was short of one man, changed from active to passive, and finally was dragged into a penalty shootout by its opponent and lost by one goal.

after the game, Zinedine Zidane went from a beloved hero to a sinner condemned by the whole country overnight because of malicious fouls.

full of unwillingness, he was forced to quit the national team and ended his career.

writer Huffland said: "of all the adverse effects in the world, the most likely to lead to success is often excessive emotion."

in many cases, the results that make people regret for the rest of their lives are mostly caused by impulses and emotions disturb the mind.

there is a good saying that most of the bitterness in life is the poison planted by emotion.

only by cultivating your emotions well can you manage your life well.

02

means that one's mood cannot be as changeable as running water. Only when one's mind is at rest can one live calmly and calmly.

walking in the world, a person's transformation from immature to mature is nothing more than a process from emotional to indifferent.

when Cai Yuanpei first became president of Peking University, he offended many old-fashioned literati by vigorously promoting vernacular.

Lin Shu, the leader of the old literary world at that time, wrote a novel called "Demon Dream".

the book compares the scholars who promote vernacular to the imps in the palace of Yan, and even turns Cai Yuanpei into the heinous King of Yan.

Cai Yuanpei's friends were furious when they saw the novel and were ready to write an article to scold him back.

but Cai Yuanpei smiled and stopped everyone.

not only did he not lose his temper, he also sent his newly written calligraphy to Lin Shu's home and asked him for advice and preface.

when Lin Shu received his calligraphy, he felt ashamed and immediately withdrew his "demon dream" and never spoke again.

the conservatives lost their backbone and naturally gave up on Cai Yuanpei's attack.

the orator Anthony Robin said: "the secret of a great life is to know how to control the power of emotion, not to be countered by it."

EPSN once conducted a personality survey of active basketball coaches in the United States.

investigators originally thought that only a coach with a temper can establish prestige and lead a team.

but the results show that the coaches who lead the team with a high winning rate are very gentle instead.

in the game, no matter whether their team is ahead or behind, they always show their composure.

because of this, they never bring extra psychological burden to the players so that the players can play at a normal level.

there is a good saying: "A person with a clean heart and no superfluous emotions and delusions will bring sense of security to the people around him."

the more excellent people are, the more calm they are in the face of problems and are not swayed by emotions.

be a calm man, do things rationally, and control your emotions in order to keep your life.

03

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your emotions are hidden in your cognition.

there is a sentence in "emotional controllability": "emotion is just a reaction to your surroundings. You will show your emotions as you see them."

when you stand at the foot of the mountain, you will feel overcast at dusk, and when you get to the top of the mountain, you will feel like "a panoramic view of the small mountains around you".

when you are by the river, you will complain about the noise of the running water, and you will sigh "the sky is pure and bright" by the river.

in the final analysis, to cultivate emotions is to cultivate vision, to refine cognition, and to form patterns.

South African psychologist Susan used to be a person with a lot of mood swings.

the apartment has a power outage, missed the subway, and the party was not invited. When it comes to the little things of sesame and mung beans, they will let her explode a little.

even when others are talking around, she gets furious and feels that they are deliberately interfering with her.

gradually, her once close friends left one by one, and her work and life became a mess.

after learning about her situation, the mentor analyzed with her the reasons for losing control every time in the past half a year.

Susan found that on 80% of the occasions, she didn't lose her temper about a specific trifle, but was dissatisfied with the bad environment around her.

the mentor told her: "when you see the larger world, you will understand all the oversensitivity, just because you are powerless to the environment in front of you."

after that, Susan devoted all her thoughts to psychological research and tried to improve her professional level.

from public high schools in the exclusion zone to foreign advanced universities, as the platform for study and work continues to improve, Susan finds that there are fewer and fewer unhappy things and people.

now Susan, a professor of psychology at Yale University, shared in her speech: we are the masters of emotions.

when our wisdom is reconciled with our inner feelings, and our actions are consistent with our values, we can overcome our emotions and become better ourselves.

unexpected problems occur every day in our life. When we encounter these problems, instead of angry and complaining, we should face the problems directly and improve our awareness and horizons.

problems bring emotions, but emotions do not solve problems.

people who are really good have learned not to be mood-oriented, but to be results-oriented.

they use reason to control emotions, change what can be changed, and look down on what cannot be changed.

and those that cannot be changed will become insignificant in the face of increasing experience year by year.

04

Professor Zeng Shiqiang once said that many people feel that their emotions cannot be changed and think that they are such a person.

but in fact, controlling your emotions is the most autonomous thing, because it's entirely your own decision.

emotion is actually a choice.

is that you choose not to let the environment of the moment affect your future life, and you don't have to torture your own feelings with the actions of others.